duccio-de-luca:

pariah-lombardi:

duccio-de-luca:

Have I ever said anything that has made you think that is what I want?

Fine. Fucking fine. If this is so difficult for you to understand let’s just fucking forget the wedding. Let’s just fuck and smoke and pretend like nothing is wrong like we always do. We’ll just forget the feelings and I will go back to being just another bed partner. 

I don’t give a shit about the wedding. My feelings will never change but you wont grasp that. So I’ll just do what I did before, sitting on the sidelines as you fuck your way around Italia. I don’t care.

Though I was one who tried to pacify myself to think love did not exist, that all life consisted of fucking puttane and earning currency. However, i was secretly obsessed with the idea that I could find a beloved some day. To fill this void, i took on many, yet failed to fully grasp the emotion.

I fell in love eventually. Not just infatuation, but true, unconditional love.
I was crushed, then begged to return, then crushed again. Here I am on the 3rd time, and my heart can barely stand another disappointment.

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You are not alone in knowing heartbreak, caro, though true you have known more than most. I told you before that I had practically become dead to feelings. I couldn’t love. I wouldn’t let myself. I couldn’t let people be close to me, to know me or accept me. I didn’t want people to identify with me or share a common stance. You know this. You remember.

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duccio-de-luca:

Let me not to the marriage of true minds 
Admit impediments. Love is not love 
Which alters when it alteration finds, 
Or bends with the remover to remove: 
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark 
That looks on tempests and is never shaken

Don’t mind me posting Shakespeare. Ttly looking for inspiration for marriage vows.